I love my SO. I love that he's a great father to our children. I love that he's started cooking meals when I'm way too busy to do so. I also love that he tries to help with the chores.
I just wish that when he did them I wouldn't have to redo them behind him most of the time. Like the dishes. I just need a constructive way to tell him that he's doing it wrong without coming across as nagging. It's frustrating to walk up to the dishwasher not only are all the setting wrong, but he's using cold water. When you turn on the cold water you're washing the dishes with COLD water. You have to turn the hot water on. Since we live in an older home I don't have a handy built in dishwasher. I have one of those roll away ones. Awesome.
Then there's the whole I put everything in the fridge even though some produce shouldn't go in the fridge. Putting it in the fridge causes it to lose it's flavor...like tomatoes. This is one of those things we argue about. We argue about stupid things. Though honestly with the whole one income thing it could be a lot worse and there's the fact we never do it in front of the children. That's a plus right?
Either way...tips on telling him that he's doing it wrong without it coming across as nagging please. I am really starting to lose my mind over this.
Not sure you'll like this, but if you want his help, you're going to have to accept that people do things differently then you do. If you can not accept that, then you will have to do them yourself.
ReplyDeleteHave you tried asking him why he does things the way he does and the reasoning behind them, rather then framing it as, "that's the wrong way, do it my way."?
I know as much as I'd like to I can't make him do things my way. I was mostly venting here. My mom nitpicked my dad about how he did chores to the point where he gave up. He's just trying to help and I don't want to discourage that. He does far more than some other men I know.
ReplyDeleteThe big thing is the dishwasher because when most of the dishes don't come clean it becomes a waste of energy and dishwasher soap.